<p><span>Many years ago, the BBC invented, for the benefit of their radio news readers, a thing called a &lsquo;cough button&rsquo;.<span>&nbsp; </span>Pressing on this button would temporarily disconnect the microphone, freeing them to make coughs, sneezes and assorted guttural hacking noises, without destroying the myth that BBC staff not only had mellifluous tones and impeccable accents, but also perfectly functioning vocal tracts.</span></p>

<p><span></span><br /> </p><p class="MsoNormal"><span>Spokespersons for the Israeli government repeatedly claim that, in a sincere attempt to avoid civilian casualties, Palestinians living the Gaza strip are sent telephone warnings to leave their homes.</span></p>

<p>As the number of deaths resulting from the Palestinian offensive on the Israeli enclave approaches one thousand, with half a dozen Palestinian civilians killed by home-made rockets fired by Kadima militants, the international community is intensifying its efforts to bring about a cease-fire.</p>

<p><span>Here are the answers for last week&rsquo;s quiz questions that may have ruined your holiday peace of mind.</span></p>

<p><span>The following questions are designed to test the efficiency of your intelligence and memory.<span>&nbsp; </span>A high score indicates that you suffer from a chronic inability to distinguish between the important and the trivial.<span>&nbsp; </span>A career in journalism or politics beckons you.</span><em><span><span> <br /></span></span></em></p>

<p class="MsoNormal"><em><span>The scene: A suite in the Pullman Hotel one evening last week.<span>&nbsp; </span>An MP is being escorted to his room for the night.</span></em><span> &lsquo;Get you filthy hands off me.<span>&nbsp; </span>I&rsquo;ve got some important business to attend to.&rsquo; &lsquo;Yes, sir.<span>&nbsp; </span>We know, sir.<span>&nbsp; </span>And Mr Newin says you can attend to it just as soon as you&rsquo;ve voted tomorrow morning.&rsquo; &lsquo;You can&rsquo;t lock me up like this.<span>&nbsp; </span>I&rsquo;m an MP for heaven&rsquo;s sake.<span>&nbsp; </span>I know my ri-&rsquo;<span>&nbsp; </span></span></p>

<p class="MsoNormal"><span>So another Constitution Day has come and gone.<span>&nbsp; </span>Just as constitutions themselves come and go.<span> </span></span><span>But while most people just enjoy yet another December holiday, the fact that December 10^th is Constitution Day for Thailand tends to overshadow the fact that it is International Human Rights Day for the rest of the world.</span></p>

<p><span>The horrific and deadly attacks on hotels, a station, a Jewish centre and other sites in Mumbai have led the media to call this episode India&rsquo;s 9/11. <br /></span></p>

<p><span>The transcript of the public address system, Suvarnabhumi International Airport.<span>&nbsp; </span>Readers are asked to imagine the following announcements read in a female voice combining the tones of maternal assurance with those of a tempting seductress.</span></p>

<p><span>It must be something catching.<span>&nbsp; </span>If you call yourself &lsquo;democratic&rsquo;, then you&rsquo;re not. </span><span>First the People&rsquo;s (self-selected minority) Alliance (of un-democratic leaders and sheep-like followers) for Democracy proposes a New Politics that is not new and certainly not democratic.</span> </p>

<p><span>So some unnamed evil-doers hatched a dastardly plot to spiritually drive spiritual tacks or nails into the 6 points of the spiritual hexagon that surrounds the equestrian statue of King Rama V, thus preventing the spiritual power emanating out of the statue from saving the nation.<span>&nbsp; </span>But the leader of the People&rsquo;s Alliance for Demagoguery, Sondhi Limthongkul, was alert enough to counter this threat.</span></p>

<p><span>By the standards of US presidential elections, a landslide is apparently defined as one candidate getting 55% of the popular vote. <span>&nbsp;</span>So President-Elect Obama is some way off that, for all the headlines.</span></p>